REASONS YOU SHOULD NOT GET MARRIED.
WRITTEN BY NGONADI UJU AMAKA, A MARRIAGE COUNSELOR AND PARENT COACH.
Marriage as an institution has been ridiculed, undermined, and degraded in recent years. Given the daily news of divorce cases, to the abnormally normal tales, of side chicks. Let us not forget the nauseating news about pedophiles’ or incest committed by the so-called “married people”.
All things abominable is now considered the work of demons, working against marriages. Men and women alike are guilty of the above stated ills but more often than not; it is the women, who are at the receiving end of this wickedness.
The people who are trampling all over the sacredness of marriage, they are guilty as charged but in the middle of these chaos is a common factor that connects them all.
“A DESPERATE WOMAN”.
The average African woman has lost almost, all that makes her an entity to be reckoned with. Desperation, misplaced priorities, and wrong teachings, being passed down from generation to generation and along the line, we have all but lost our sense of self.
First, there is no marriage without a woman. At least biblically. Yes. It is the man, who locates you, and proposes to you. But, it is you, the woman who has the power to make the union a reality or not. When and if you say yes, that is the beginning of a union but if you say no, then there is no union.
The Bible clearly stated, “a man shall leave his mother and father and then cling to his wife.”
If women are to marry for the right reasons, there will be a major drop down on the amount of evil perpetrated with impunity against humankind, God, woman and marriage. Dare to break free from the shackles of wrong teachings by parents who mean well but know nothing about shame and values. Do not adopt the formula that worked for your parents and expect it to work for you. Be your own woman, seek knowledge, and create your own path.
Marriage is not a ticket to heaven and no human should lower his or her standard. No human should trample on their self-pride nor allow others to demean them the way even animals will not allow all in the name of marriage.
Let us stop marrying for the wrong reasons.
We need to teach our children to reclaim the lost pride of the woman.
In my years of research, reading up articles on marriage, studying marriages, from my personal experiences, and counseling couples. I have been able to map out reasons why we should not marry.
Please note that Marriage is a beautiful experience, no matter what anybody says. There is no marriage without flaws, but there are happy marriages, filled with love and sweetness. This we achieve when we at least prepare ourselves the much we can by gathering and learning right and proper values.
Do not refuse to marry because of another person’s ugly experience, rather choose to marry for the right reasons.
TEN REASONS YOU SHOULD NOT MARRY:
DO NOT MARRY FOR THE TITLE
DO NOT MARRY TO ESCAPE A PAST
DO NOT MARRY WHEN YOUR BRAIN IS NOT IN SYNC WITH YOUR HEART
DO NOT MARRY TO PLEASE ANYBODY
DO NOT MARRY TO ESCAPE POVERTY
DO NOT MARRY TO ESCAPE LONELINESS
DO NOT MARRY WITHOUT A SOURCE OF INCOME
DO NOT MARRY TO SPITE YOUR PARENTS
DO NOT MARRY FOR LOVE WITHOUT FRIENDSHIP
DO NOT MARRY WHERE AND WHEN YOU ARE NOT ACCEPTED.
My pro bono advice to you “Do not marry for physical attributes nor should age be a yardstick for measuring responsibility”. Grey hairs does not always equal wisdom neither is being young a sign of irresponsibility.
Set a standard, for yourself and subsequently for your man. Demand discipline from yourself and groom yourself then your aura will attract the right people to you.
To marry right, you have to present yourself as the right person.
How prepared are you for marriage? It’s never too late to get it right!